Being a fan of someone, I always find that a bit awkward. At the same time, it is fun to stand there blushing like a teenager when you are lucky enough to meet the person you admire. On the other hand, there is always the risk that such an encounter will be a huge disappointment, putting even more pressure on such a moment. I repeat: awkward!

Years ago, the big publishers used to unpack. A famous writer would be flown in as a special guest at Elfia (Europe's largest costume event). A day was usually set aside for interviews. Those interviews took place in a renowned hotel on the Herengracht in Amsterdam. Poepiechic all around.

Because I was active for Holland SF (now HSF, the magazine of the NCSF) for many years, this allowed me to interview some of my favorite writers. Cycling along the canals with bulging panniers full of books to get signed and buckling knees, they remain special memories.

The Master

One writer in particular has stayed with me. I was a fan of his work for quite some time, but that meeting him would have such an impact on me, I never dreamed.

Clive Barker is without a doubt the grand master of horror. He not only writes macabre stories (The books of blood, for example), but has also brought his own creations to life on the silver screen (such as Hellraiser, Nightbreed and Candyman). In addition, he is a painter. His paintings are the guideline for his book series Abarat.

The interviews took place in the hotel library. Well, where else do you put a writer but among books?

My knees still buckled upon entering the library, but Clive Barker turned out to be the nicest man I ever had the pleasure of meeting. 

Until that moment, I never really understood how it is possible that people can become completely captivated by someone and be willing to follow a cult leader to the death, for example. Bit of a strange comparison perhaps, but Clive Barker made me feel special. The feeling of 'who am I to interview this famous writer as a representative of some obscure Dutch magazine' disappeared as soon as I sat down opposite him. Even testing the recording equipment had his undivided attention. That man radiates warmth and interest.

What followed was a particularly pleasant conversation, in which I was also able to speak my mind from a writer's point of view. It didn't feel weird at all to tell him that I also wrote. This allowed me to go deep into what it means to be a writer and how it feels to touch the lives of others, while for the writer himself the creation of the book has long been behind him. 

Forever a fan

If Clive Barker started a cult I would be up front and if he told me to jump, I would jump. Fortunately, such things (and many times worse than that) only happen in his books. And even though I'm still totally over the moon about the man (apparently I still spontaneously start blushing when talking about Clive Barker) following him to death seems a bit excessive to me. I have more to do than give my life for Mr. Charisma. On the other hand ... never say never

Anyway, it seems wise when I don't hold my breath to see if Mr. Barker is ever going to recruit me as a champion of his cult. Meanwhile, many years after this memorable encounter, I find myself giving book presentations and signing books at Elfia myself. It shouldn't get any crazier.

Have you ever had the opportunity to meet one of your heroes? Was it a fun encounter or was it disappointing?